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my black eye? dracula, where's leatherface? sucking off frankenstein? i like candy.
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Monday, July 31, 2006
I feel hollow tonight- just like an old stump down by the swamp. Nah, actually I'm pretty arright with the world for the greater portion of doings and events, so here's the lowdown. It's my world... a: I like the pool. Even if the pool is kinda hot and has sticks and bugs in it. I still like it. b: I always crack the fuck up when I see a naked kid standing with his/her mom. Cuz, it's like some two-year old is just like "Fuck it, ma. I ain't wearin' no fuckin' clothes. c: I really can't play tennis for shit any more. d:If you ever djay at Go, be sure to play songs that compare moose lips to a woman' special place. e: If you think Miami Vice is stupid and cheesy and akin to the Dukes of Hazard, then go fuck yourself. The only thing shitty about that movie is the soundtrack. f: That dude on Pound Street is more prominent now. Sometimes, he takes his cig break down to the Jelas Tax Service parking lot and prowls around a bit. He always wears the same plaid short sleeve shirt, jeans and no shoes or socks. He walks down the street or just stands on the blacktop when the street must be about 110 degrees. He should either move to Calcutta or join the circus. Maybe he could double as the bearded lady. He leaves his door open and blasts classic rock radio. He hasn't asked me again if I'm on the city council. g: Man, that fucking lump crab omelette at Last Resort was enormous. And those Bloody Marys were another meal on their own. And shit, the fucking cheese grits nearly disemboweled me. I submit. h: Hey, does anyone wanna go to jail with me at 1:00 am Saturday morning? i: Slim Thug has a big house. j: I have another time share deal. Should I go to Vegas? http://youtube.com/watch?v=iw0Ll8k0CNo&search=good%20googly%20moogly That thang is juicy http://youtube.com/watch?v=eRjGl-92ObU&search=morris%20brown Hey, do you guys think they can do the Willie Wonka? just bees and thangs i like it when rappers are friends and they rap about how they like each other and want to party with each other. i don't like it so much when rappers say mean things about one another and hate. it is more fun when they are rolling with pals and passing off the mic and talking about having fun and stuff. did you know that wassup rockers dress like eazy e? did you know that every skinny hipster in NY is basically dressing like eazy e these days??! SHOCKING BUT IT'S TRUE! i'm flipping it and dressing like dirt mcgirt. fuck all the haters! Friday, July 28, 2006
Thursday, July 27, 2006
Tomorrow night, dated Friday, the last one in July, Strawberry Julius and Frzzzly Rooster will once again be playing some tunes down at Go. This time, without the high-speed chase through the Cobbham District, past Go and on to the Kangaroo on Chase. Music will begin around 11:00 pm, and everyone is invited to partake in the vast amounts of revelry. Cya toodles. Wednesday, July 26, 2006
what's going on in belarus? HUGO CHAVEZ EDITION! BC-BELARUS-VENEZUELA 07-25 0485 BC-BELARUS-VENEZUELA (UPDATE 1, PICTURE) UPDATE 1-Venezuela, Belarus seal anti-imperialist alliance (Adds details, background) MINSK, July 25 (Reuters) - Venezuela's President Hugo Chavez said on Tuesday he had forged a strategic alliance to stand up to U.S. imperialism with fellow maverick Belarussian President Alexander Lukashenko. "Our countries must keep their hands at the ready on the sword," Chavez, in ex-Soviet Belarus as part of a world tour, said on a visit to a military academy. "After a day of intensive work, we have created a strategic alliance between our countries," he said, speaking through an interpreter. "It is absolutely vital to protect our homeland, to guard against internal and external threats." The flamboyant Venezuelan leader, who often antagonizes the United States despite it being his country's principal trade partner, spent much of his two-day trip to the landlocked Eastern European nation visiting military sites and watching staged battles. "The jaws of imperialism and hegemonism have both us and Belarus in their grip," he said. The precise nature of the alliance was sketchy, but Chavez and Lukashenko did sign an agreement during the visit to share military technology, the Venezuelan government news agency ABN said, without giving further details. The two countries also said they would set up joint ventures to cooperate on oil exploration and production. Venezuela plans to supply Belarus with crude in return for construction materials and technology. Venezuela is the world's No. 5 oil exporter and the fourth-largest supplier of crude to the United States. Chavez is a bitter U.S critic and proclaims socialist ideals to unite South America against Washington's influence, though the nation's economy is predominantly market-driven and heavily dependent on the oil industry. Lukashenko oversees a Soviet-style command economy. Washington says he runs the last dictatorship in Europe. Belarus is subject to European Union and U.S. sanctions after Western observers accused him of rigging his own re-election in March. Wednesday, July 19, 2006
If I had sold my soul to Satan for a mess of pottage, at least I would damn well collect the pottage and eat it too. William Faulkner I'm having a difficult time with motivation following two bouts with a swimming pool in Alabama. Language socialization just isn't getting it for me, and I've put off my school assignments until the morn. The video store was closed, so I couldn't rent a dvd as I had intended. So I made some melted cheddar on Triscuit snacks and upon second thought, I added hamburger dill slices, yellow mustard and leftover tomoates from our dinner salad. I, too, enjoyed a bit of Athenos Roasted Red Pepper hummus. My mother asked me which hummus I liked the best and I replied "plain" in dull fashion. I accidentally stepped on Two Possum's paw and then tried to look up old high school friends on Myspace, while reading my class assignments on another screen. I found the two dumbass dudes I expected to find, contemplated a "Wassup" message, and quickly decided that I didn't want either aforementioned creep peeking at the profiles of any of my female friends. And you know what? When I ate the Triscuits, I wasn't even slightly hungry. It was just something to do. Moms and I watched the Travel channel together while we dined (she was only eating hummus and Triscuits) and she mentioned that she had already seen the episode of whatever the hell we were watching. So much for family bonding. So, here I sit, sober as a wandering pedagogue without any of the fringe benefits, watching my summer vacation fade. Tuesday, July 18, 2006
candy mandible! hey. HEY! can't you see i'm cooking a couple of steak sandwiches for me and my loved one while the new to live and shave in l.a. is playing on the bose sound system? whattayou, some kind of peepin tom!? tha fuck outta here! renaldo! hey. HEY! can't you see i'm trying to bathe in here while listening to the new borbetomagus record!? what, you trying to take a glimpse of my prick! get out of here! sussi! hey. HEY! what you want from me? can't you see i'm trying to watch this smegma video on youtube!? tha fuck outta here! Monday, July 17, 2006
there's a button on your shoulder and i'm pushing it over and over i made this crazy post of all the pictures of shit that i was doing the past 24 hours but it just don't do it justice so i deleted it and decided to mention the mentionables instead: there were frenchmen and beaches and the ring 2 and my friend sleeping with me while watching it and pastice and bloodys and beers and a smiths party and a richard linklater movie and a dining at a french restaurant and some game that they throw steel balls and some french girl that said "it's you again." and some other girl that said, "no actually i dont." and a dog and a garden and a 8 dollar 2 pbrs and a velvet rope and a couple of cabs and a couple of coffees and two wines on the house and some dude in a speedo with balls a swaggalin and a bathroom that smelled like house of 1000 corpses and a bathroom with a guy with a whistle and a rolly coaster and a park and a guy selling airplane booze bottles on the beach and a guy that tried to grab my prick and a some awesome spanish smiths song and michel gondry and the awesome french girls and sand and blisters and a slice and a sapporo and a ariel pink and me in my bed. i'll be comatose till tuesday.  Oh, and how a man walks through a Krystal drive through at 3:30 am, soaking wet and wearing purple boxers, a stained white tee shirt, black Clarks Wallabees and a corsage upon the wrist, reeking of sweat following a glorious wedding celebration. Huzzah for summer, huzzah for the newlyweds, huzzah for hanging out on the rooftops and huzzah for the Wassups. And let's not forget the Georgia Thumpers, and most of all, let's not forget the frogs. Wednesday, July 12, 2006
Funny Farm doesn't present Chevy Chase at his worst. But it ain't his best either. That movie has so much potential, but... Sunday, July 09, 2006
Wassup Rockers! I am a Southern man visiting friends in Manhattan and Brooklyn. I am so fucking Southern at this point in my life that if you slit my shit open collard greens and chicken legs will fucking push themselves from my entrails at a rapidfire pace. And, I is what I is. So that brings me to Larry Clark's new teen fuckfest (errrr-not), Wassup Rockers! Okay, guys I know that love Larry Clark films because you secretly wanna go all Gary Glitter and shit all over crotch shots of Bijou Phillips, this ain't you. And dudes that just want to see some asshole skinny ass white teen skaters beat the shit out of a tru thug in the park after smoking a joint and fantasize about being able to totally take out some buck dude, this ain't for ya'll either. This ones for the lovers, the true romancers, the LAurel n Hardy types and anyone who's got half a heart. Yeah, my shit got blown. He got it so right this time. The preps, the Rockers, the GPS, the cops and the Beverly Hills preps, oh, and don't forget Janice Dickinson make this movie totally rad in that way when you're like I don't expect to feel this awesome after seeing a movie,and then you see this movie amidst a sea of restroom dwelling geriatrics. So, what, a fucking Guat? Friday, July 07, 2006
Make a deal with the city, stupid fucks. a: So, I hopped out of bed at 5:18 am and, after a shower, I headed to the Atlanta airport. Traffic wasn't bad, but I arrived over three hours early. b: Big fucking deal 'cuz I bumped that flight up to the 9:20 flight and landed in Newark at 11:00 am. c: I recommend flying into Newark and taking the bus into the city. Nice view of New Jersey. d: Observation one: J.K. should move to New York, and if you know where I'm going with this, then you already know. e: Nicky's Vietnamese sandwiches are awesome as all-get-out. Think cuban, but Vietnamese instead. We both had spicy portabella sandwiches on french baguettes and the were like 4 bucks each. I eyed but decided against the shrimp crackers. f: I need to go into Other Music with a plan. It's overwhelming if one doesn't exist. I was not happy that all of the other baile funk comps are Brooklyn creations (i.e. remixes). Those got to stay on the shelves. g: I saw this little Reggae music store that I must visit before I leave. There was enough cool stuff in the window, not including rasta flags and lions, to warrant me spending my paycheck there. h: Man, Wimbledon is about as surprising as the knowledge that I am going to get drunk this evening. i: Athenians, go to Donderos kitchen. Do your dumb asses a favor and do so. Now! j: I just finished two of my three classes for the semester. The weather is right, the Puerto Rican kids are playing in the sprinkler in the park below and summer vacation has begun. Tomorrow, it's off to Sal's Pizzeria for a couple of slices and then we're going to see the Statue of Liberty. After I eat a couple of hot dogs and a bagel, I will want a cold Italian ice that I can press against my boner. Then, it's to the subway train (never mind that skil saw) to jet on out to Coney Island, where I'll eat sone raw clams and win a cupie doll to bring home to my girl. Then we're hitting a Broadway play and going to Times Square. Oh, and I'll need a bagel and a deli sandwich for sustenance. And, if the Yankees are on a home stretch, it's off to da Bronx. Put me in coach, I'm ready to play. what's going on in belarus?  Alexander Kozulin this is from AP:
Thursday, July 06, 2006
weekly update 1. ken lay totally offed himself, and if you don't believe that then i'll bet you were real sad when slobodan milosevic went gentle into that good night as well. 2. bin laden's putting out so many tapes nigga needs to start a podcast. 3. my man in ath, kennie b., is coming to visit tomorrow and we're about to stomp around the town and see what it's like to have those bloodys in the park. 4. it's tai shan's birthday on sunday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY LITTLE FRIEND. =-more to come!... Tuesday, July 04, 2006
  Oh YEAH! And, I want this with a big scoop of vanilla ice cream! Oh and this looks pretty arright ! But what about JAck Tripper? Have a safe, productive 4th of July, fellow Americans. Q: Hey, which ultra-famous film icon, almsot popped Leah Thompson's cherry and then nearly gave the world's cutest baby sitter a rainbow kiss in the marine regions. A: Jaws 3, stupid fuck! I just re-watched JAws 3 in even partial 3d as Pswils pulled out two pairs of foggy as fuck 3d glasses. My favorite part that was in 3d but I did not watch in 3d was when Jaws exploded and both rows of teeth were just floating in the water, It's like a bomb can blow up a 37-ft. shark, but a shark's teeth are forever. And if you think I'm bullshitting you, just hop on 85 S, take the 185 S exit near Lagrange, stop at McDonalds on Stadium Drive in Phenix City for a sausage biscuit and a log of hash brown and then stop again at the McDonalds in Dothan for an early lunch. I would tell you to stop at Tom Mann's Fishworld in Eufala, but that's been closed and pretty much a goner since the 100 lb. alligator gar died like a decade ago. So, anyway, follow Dothan to Panama City and go in any store. I mean I don't even give a fuck. Go to the fucking Hello Kitty store in the Panama City Mall for all I care and see if they don't have a shark's tooth. Every store in Panama City, Florida, sells sharks teeth, either alone or pre-necklaced. So fuck it. Be it. Live it. ride it. Happy independence day! Saturday, July 01, 2006
sattidy night i think that naked pregnant britney is hotter than a stack of sonic youth cd's at a pawn shop in athens. i love britney and all the people who give her greif for eating cheetohs, walking barefoot, and holding her baby in her lap can go find a short pier and start walkin. she's just livin her life. i've also heard people sayin things about her attractiveness and how it's beginning to diminish but those people are so full of shit their q-tips come out brown. maybe she made a mistake by marrying that titanic moron, but hey, in the end aren't we all fools for love? in conclusion, britney = hot. |
